Maybe it’s just me, but the only way a post ever makes it on this site is if I sit down and write a post the moment I have an idea. Otherwise, I end up with a paragraph or two and it’s left to rot in my drafts forever. Stuff that I’ve had sitting in my drafts folder for up to a year that you may or may not see sometime in the future:
- Bungaku Shoujo
- End of the Golden Witch
- Hidamari Proof Sketch
- The Reappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya
- Heaven’s Feel
- f(Angel Beats)
This is a story post so spoilers bla bla bla.
So I’m about halfway through the campaign of Starcraft 2: Wings of Liberty. For the most part, the story was pretty okay. I mean, the characters on the Hyperion are your typical sci-fi motley crew of guys and you’re going around freedom fighting against the Dominion. The missions themselves are pretty neat. But then Zeratul shows up and I’m all awesome, I can play as Zeratul and the Protoss, wooooo.
As I’m going through the Zeratul missions, I’m constantly reminded of that Idle Thumbs episode where they talk about Mass Effect. Basically, the complaint was that all video game plots eventually ended up being about saving the universe and it turns out there’s a prophecy and a chosen one. It’s never about being a space cop or something, it always has to be something overwrought and grandiose. And that’s exactly where Starcraft 2′s story is going.
The first Starcraft was about three races. The Terran campaign was about overthrowing the oppressive rule of the Confederacy and trying to stave off the Zerg invasion. The Zerg campaign was about the Zerg trying to assimilate the Terrans so they could eventually take on and assimilate the Protoss to become the perfect beings. The Protoss campaign was about fighting the Zerg off. After that, the Protoss had to find a new homeworld, Terrans from earth wanted to pacify the Koprulu Sector, and Kerrigan wanted to ruin everyone’s plans. There was nothing about saving the world in any of Starcraft; each player in the story had their own motivations.
Now I play Starcraft 2 and what am I getting? The Zerg aren’t so bad, you guys, the Overmind was forced to try and assimilate the Protoss! You thought Kerrigan was the villain, but she’s actually the chosen one and she’s going to save the universe!
I can already see where this is going. Starcraft 2: Heart of the Swarm is undoubtedly going to be about the Zerg’s fight for freedom as they seek to overcome their bloodthirsty nature and tap in to their former noble animal spirits. Finally, in Starcraft 2: Protoss Boogaloo, all three races come together to face down the Xel’Naga who are going to burn the universe down.
What the hell happened to Blizzard that the only storyline they can write now is Warcraft III’s?
I like how I went through the trouble of changing my theme to a format that displayed more than two posts at a time back then, in hopes that I’d write shorter posts more frequently but didn’t.
Oh wait, I guess I don’t like that.